If you are engaging in a sexual behaviour that’s causing you distress, pain or anguish I offer a confidential, non-judgmental and supportive counselling service where we allow some space to make some enquiry, reach some understanding and then, if we decide, we endeavour to make some lasting changes to that behaviour. I provide Sex Addiction Counselling in various Dublin locations.
I don’t set out in our confidential sessions to judge or change a persons behaviour, we set out together to understand it and see exactly what part of the behaviour is causing the distress or suffering and what might resolve this distress or ease this suffering.
Sexual problems come in different forms including addiction to or an unhealthy relationship with:
Masturbation or fantasy.
Sadistic or masochistic behavior.
Other excessive sexual pursuits.
There can be many emotional symptoms and negative effects resulting from the above behaviour and we usually make it a goal to be free of these. Some examples of the symptoms or effects an unhealthy relationship or addiction to sex can cause are :
- A lack of healthy boundaries.
- Staying in relationships that aren’t healthy, or jumping from relationship to relationship.
- When alone, you might feel empty or incomplete. You might also sexualise feelings like guilt, loneliness or fear.
Some effects of this behaviour can include :
- A decline in personal relationships, social, and family engagement.
- Decreased concentration and productivity at work.
- Physical consequences like sexual dysfunction or sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).
But most commonly it can have profound psychological effects, like generating feelings of shame, inadequacy, and emotional distress.
Other symptoms are :
- You feel powerless over how you act sexually.
- Your sexual choices are making your life unmanageable.
- You feel shame, embarrassment or even self-loathing over your sexual acts.
- You promise yourself you’ll change, but fail to keep those promises.
- You’re so preoccupied with sex it becomes like a ritual to you.
If you can relate to the symptoms mentioned above, or know somebody who meets these criteria, do not hesitate to ask for help.
What Are the Causes of these problems ?
There is no easy answer to this question, particularly as each person develops in a way that is unique to them. In my work I respect the uniqueness of each individual I meet. Some factors that I have found to be common are :
A genetic predisposition to emotional impulsive actions, or sensation seeking behavior. You may also have a predisposition to other traits that are commonly associated with sexual addiction, like anxiety or depression.
There may also be a link to Higher levels of sex related hormones like testosterone or estrogen.
Your development as a child may have contributed to your behaviour now. Perhaps you experienced rejection, abuse or exposure to sexual content.
Difficulty with relationships either intimate or social can lead to you to seek alternative ways to meet your sexual needs. Or indeed you may be influenced in such relationships in a way that does not seem right to who you are.
Whatever the behaviour, symptoms, effects or causes, I will help you address the factors that are maintaining a sex or porn addiction or problem, and hopefully we will learn to be with your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in a healthy way.